Finding Hope

I've been thinking about how to create the best message for your birthday, but my mind is too occupied right now to write you one. And I would like to apologize for that. Thank you for bringing us into this world, for taking care of us when were still infants by showering us with love, and up until now we can still feel it --- the kind of love and care that only you can give. You were there for us when we were at our lowest, even though sometimes we don't share it to you. I feel bad for doing that, because you deserve to know how we felt when problems come in our way.  Just recently you called and told me that you noticed that there was something off about me, and right after telling me I immediately told you about all the things that's bothering me right now, your instinct surely is so strong. Back in August of last year, you also did that and I cried because I just have to let all of the emotional baggage out and towards you. It felt so...

This is the first time since April 14 that I started to write my entry, and for the past four months I've been through a lot of ups and downs. Let's go back to April when Rajh and I started working as a CE trainees under Dr Cabije, and I must say that I've learned a lot in the construction field after that short working experience. During this time we were also juggling our thesis project, so it was quite a challenge. Aside from the part-time job and our thesis, I also had the opportunity to be a part of the Mr. & Ms. PICEsiklaban pageant and had somehow won 1st Runner Up, the Best in Q&A, and some minor awards. The month of April was really a roller coaster ride, I enjoyed it but there were times where I wanted to scream out of frustration and stress. I welcomed the month of May with anxiousness and excitement. The thought of what would come next after we passed our thesis and celebrate our graduation made me very anxious, though the excitement of finally finishing...

Another achievement unlocked! Mr. PICEsiklaban 2021 1st Runner Up Best in Q&A Best in Talent Best in Production Number I was only aiming for the Best in Q&A award but I was blessed with three more. This is for everyone who believed in me since the day I decided to join. I could not have done this without the help and support of the people around me. To my family who has supported my decision in joining the pageant. Thank you so much! To my girlfriend, June , for the unwavering support that she has given to me and for helping me all throughout my preparation. From the concept photoshoot until the Q&A preparation, you have really helped me be more confident in this pageant. To my pageant partner, Khriselle , you did great and I'm so proud of all the awards that you have garnered in the pageant and the preparations that you have made to represent PICE-Silliman. Congratulations, partneeer!! I hope we could still make that advocacy possible! To Kliff Rajh and Margaret ,...

As someone who grew up being so insecure about his physical appearance, tonight marks a historic feat in my life. This pageant may be different from traditional ones, but the shift from face-to-face to online classes has ultimately affected the setting of all major events and projects. Virtual or not, I shall stand right in front of everyone, not to prove my worth but to inspire individuals who are having a hard time dealing with their insecurities and anxiousness. To tell you the truth, I didn't plan on joining the event weeks before this. But someone had to step up and take the challenge when no one else can. In my own point of view, I believe that there are no winners and no losers in a pageant. Everyone deserves the crown right after they decided to join, the confidence, wit, and determination of all the candidates make them worthy successors of the crown. To win the hearts of the people is more fulfilling than to win the crown that divides us all. I'm inviting everyone to ...

  I left Bongao, the capital of the province of Tawi-Tawi seven years ago with one goal in mind --- to finish college and to make my family proud. As I was searching for myself in Dumaguete, I got lost, to a point where it has affected my academics. Everything was all new, and it got the worst of me. I tried to adjust, but it wasn't enough. I was not doing well, and I went down the rabbit hole. I missed home, and I wanted to come back. I met a lot of people in Duma, and these people stopped me from leaving. Aside from the people, I have learned to love this laid-back city like I was born here. And I believe that I'm not the only one, anyone who has studied or moved to Duma will always tell everyone that they have been captivated by the charm of this small university town in the southern part of Negros Island. So, this is my postcard to Dumaguete, a place that has always been so dear to me. I will be leaving the halls of Silliman equipped with all the learnings from the experie...

We all face a daily struggle with our own inner demons that can influence our behavior and how others perceive us. These demons are the result of deep-seated traumas that have left us scarred for life. Unfortunately, fighting these demons can be challenging because every time we engage with them, we risk strengthening them by feeding into our weaknesses. Despite this challenge, some have managed to persevere, while others have succumbed to their inner battles. It is a universal truth that almost everyone faces an internal battle of some sort. However, some people may not understand or acknowledge the weight of our struggles. Nevertheless, it is essential to keep fighting back and demonstrate to our demons that we will not let them control our thoughts and actions. Today, your mind might feel like a battlefield, but always remember that you are a WARRIOR. The way you fight back against your inner demons will determine your fate. Do not give up; keep fighting, and know that you are not a...

I find the early mornings in Dumaguete to be truly special. There's a sense of peace and tranquility that envelops the town, and it's truly a wonderful way to start the day. Unfortunately, I don't always manage to wake up early enough to experience it, which is a real shame. One of the things I love most about Dumaguete is the way it blends the hustle and bustle of city life with the simple pleasures of provincial living. It's an amazing place that offers the best of both worlds. When I do manage to wake up early, I like to go for a bike ride and visit the 'manangs' in the neighborhood. They're always setting up their stalls on the roadside to sell delicious treats like puto't tsokolate and sari-sari, and they greet you with big smiles on their faces. It's such a warm and welcoming atmosphere, and it really helps to set the tone for the rest of the day. If I'm not in the mood for puto't tsokolate, I'll head straight to Rizal Boulevard and...

Lately, I've been feeling like a shadow of my former self. Time seems to be slipping away too quickly, leaving me feeling overwhelmed and out of breath. Sometimes, it feels like the weight of the world is pressing down on me, making it difficult to keep up with everything as I used to. This experience feels like a crisis, and I worry that I'm on the verge of collapse. But I know that I can't afford to give up. I need to be strong and resilient, not just for myself but also for those who believe in me. Despite my efforts to move forward, I often stumble and fall, leaving me with bruises and scars. Yet, I know that I can't give up on my goals. Life is a race that we must run, no matter how tough the journey may seem. We have to keep moving forward until we reach the finish line. Right now, I might be bruised, but these are only temporary setbacks. In fact, I believe that failures can be a valuable tool for personal growth. Bruises can create strength and build faith. So, ...

This morning, I had an amazing experience joining the Ride4Women event. Despite not planning to attend, a post from one of my mentors inspired me to ask if walk-in registrations were still accepted. Unfortunately, I was told that they were not. However, I decided to wait for Sir Abe and his friend near Pantawan and took in the stunning sunrise scenery. After the participants had already passed by, I joined in and had a great time cycling thanks to the hours I had spent doing leg workouts in the gym. Once the ride ended, I headed home and fell into a deep sleep. My body was exhausted from the past few stressful weeks, so the rest was much needed. As I prepare for tomorrow, I'm feeling anxious and stressed about what's to come. However, the positive experience of the ride has given me a boost of confidence to face the challenges ahead. Here's hoping for a good day! ☕

Today was a long day, as I spent 10 hours working on-site under the scorching sun. The heat was intense, and I found myself sweating profusely while also feeling the sting of sunburn on my skin. Despite the challenging conditions, I managed to complete a quiz on-site. As I stood in the shade of a tree and watched my fellow workers toil away in the heat, I couldn't help but admire their determination. No matter how challenging the work or how intense the weather, they persisted in their efforts, working from 8 in the morning until 9 at night, all to support their families. Their dedication reminded me of the importance of hard work and earning a living through effort and perseverance. As the saying goes, "satisfaction lies in the effort, not in the attainment." I may have been exhausted after a long day, but the sense of accomplishment and satisfaction that comes from hard work is undeniable. ☕️